Esquire Theater: great films, location, deals

When you’re in Cincinnati, there are a lot of different ways you can watch a movie. I mean, a movie is a movie; it’s roughly two hours of the same scenes that will be the same every time you watch it. The same actors will do the same things and every time you’ll walk away thinking the same things about how you would’ve ended it better. The only way you can watch a movie differently is to experience it differently. To some, this may come in the form of downing a few spirits beforehand and making a game out of who can follow the plot the longest, but the differences I’m getting at here is the theater experience.

West Chester’s Rave Theatres and Newport on the Levee’s AMC theatres (not technically even in the same state as Cincinnati, but shh) provide big comfy chairs, stadium-style seating and the flashiest and biggest shows you can find. The Danbarry Dollar Savers spread around town provide an unintentional grindhouse experience that Tarantino himself would applaud: torn screens, sticky floors, vocal audiences and cheap prices make for a unique experience. Even the small Mariemont Theatre in (you guessed it) Mariemont provides an experience of sorts: its small selection is guaranteed to provide something for every member of the family and it often showcases films that play nowhere else.

But the meat of what I’m alluding to here with all this experience talk can be found in the Mariemont’s sister theater, the Esquire. Just looking at the Clifton theater should be a quick enough indication that you’re in for something unique.

Stuck between a couple of businesses in Clifton’s Gaslight District, the theater looks like it’s been nestled between a coffee shop and an Italian restaurant for 300 years. The flashy marquee jutting out over the sidewalk in front of the building, coupled with the singular, old-fashioned ticket booth out front further the idea that your movie-going experience is going to harken to the past, before your trip to the theater was just another tally mark movie executives got to add to their weekend gross numbers.

The movies inside further this idea.

There is usually one big name movie playing at any given time; you’ve got your Star Treks and your Angels and Demons and your movies about Will Smith being emotionally relatable, because, well, they make money and have wide appeal, but there is a reason that people come to the Esquire to see movies that they could easily see at any larger theatre with more footroom: It’s cool. It’s a really cool theatre. I don’t mean to beat a dead horse, but that’s the main idea. There aren’t parking garages, double-digit ticket prices, long lines, screaming kids, creepy guys in the bathrooms who aren’t doctors no matter what they say and a total void of culture for miles around. The Esquire has the opposite of all those things. Their bathroom doctor is legit.

And check this out: I haven’t even gotten to the Esquire’s big draw yet. Their selection outside of the “one big name movie” is above is top notch. Foreign movies that you have to read (but, I swear, you could just watch the actors’ eyes and know the story. French people know their acting), movies with small budgets but a lot of heart, movies with big-name stars acting too quirky to get major studio funding, you’ll find it all at the Esquire. (Note: Not literally “it all.” At any given time, there are thousands of movies that aren’t playing at the Esquire. But the seven or eight they have are usually gems that you can’t find anywhere else. And those thousands that aren’t there can probably be found on Netflix, so I don’t see the problem.)

Also, on Saturday nights they do screenings of The Rocky Horror Picture Show where people dress up and disappoint their parents. Tuesdays are bargain days because it’s a really boring day where all activities are automatically depressing; $5.50 all day, no matter what you see or when you see it. Students: flash your ID Wednesday through Monday for discounts.

So remember: there are lots of different ways to watch movies in Cincinnati and the Esquire sure is one of them.